i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Randomize
