idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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