All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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