When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
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