the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
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