I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Damn victory sex feels great
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize