I need help removing her.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
