i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
