Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
Randomize
