There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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