what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
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