I'm sorry my penis didn't work
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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