I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
