He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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