i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
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