Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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