I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
