I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
