What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
