Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
