And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
