True but thats because hes a fetus.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
