i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
You can't just leave with hair like that
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
