all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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