I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
you win again, gameday.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
