Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
