In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
she woke up with a sticky ear
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Randomize
