Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
