he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
