he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
