People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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