so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
