Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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