i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
