Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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