An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
