you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Randomize
