Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
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