i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Randomize
