You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
