I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Randomize
