And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
