Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
