So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
