I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
