Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
FUCK WHALES
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
