He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Randomize
