Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
