I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
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