Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
